Peaceful Depression Lyrics

I'm putting on my defense

(Will I ever feel appreciated)

It's because I'm right on the edge

(Maybe in a different timeline)

And I'm not indestructible

(Fuck it for now)

I'm not indestructible

My heart is under repair

That's if you even would care

(I'm tired, man)

That I'm not indestructible

(Can't quit though)

I'm not indestructible

Oh, to be young and to be so free

No overthinking, no worries

Lately, my life has been

So disgusting and gory

And as it seems, honestly

I don't know how to follow my dreams

What steps should I be taking

All I do is just be me

Even that is not working

Cause the shit you need to do

Till you see a revenue

Makes you feel like you're a fool

A facade of failure too

All the masks you need to use

Hide the realest parts of you

Working jobs you really hate

Jobs so bullshit that degrades

You and even though you're great

You just start to feel you ain't

Which then fucks your mental state

And you start to contemplate

About your life and future fate

All the choices that you made

All of that then frustrates

You and makes you feel depressed

Then you question so and so

Like how to cope with zero hope

With your suicidal thoughts

And you just feel so alone

That you resort to the rope

Hang yourself it don't feel right

But you're tired and all out of fight

I'm putting on my defense

Because I'm right on the edge

And I'm not indestructible

I'm not indestructible

My heart is under repair

It's a few we don't care

And I'm not indestructible

I'm not indestructible

Man internal I burn infernal

Lava flowing in me

And it burns all that

Doubt always come back like a circle

And I guess that is why I journal

Cause my thoughts always pop like a kerne

I can't control

And I ain't no colonel

I wonder if this feeling eternal

Love makes me so weirded out

Why is that I can't point out

Trauma push me not to shout

I don't know where the problem lies

I'm losing me I feel disguised

I am never satisfied

If I reach the highest highs

I'll throw myself up to the skies

I'll never feel as if I strived

Shit not even feel I tried

I am at my wits' end

All that is left is a whim

The light of hope in me is dim

I put all my shit in the gym

Just hoping that I will win

No matter how much I put in

I still feel as if I'm slacking

And then the wormhole begins

Overthinking, spiraling

Questioning who I'm within

Only focusing on sin

And as if someone pushed the pin

The grenade inside my brain

Overloaded, bombs exploding

Tick, tick, tick, tick

I put in my defense

Because I'm right on the edge

And I'm not indestructible

I'm not indestructible

My heart is under repair

As if you even care

And I'm not indestructible

I'm not indestructible

Lately I've been reminiscing

Thinking about all I've written

All the anger, hate and disses

All the slurs I've said and spit

And how misled and spiteful I've been

I don't feel like I changed the world

Nor have helped a single soul

Everything meant a selfish cause

I'm 23 ain't started yet

Full of hate and some regrets

And I will motherfucking bet

Not a tear on me will shed

I've been depressed and called for help

A bullet to the head and I end up dead

Fuck it, here goes my last breath

I put in my defense

Because I'm right on the edge

And I'm not indestructible

I'm not indestructible

My heart is under repair

As if you even care

And I'm not indestructible

I'm not indestructible