I'm Tired of Lying and Sinning Lyrics

Lost in paradise

I was lying, I was sinning, I'm asking god to give me purpose

She played my heart, before all that she thought that I deserved it

She told me sorry, she apologized, we both ain't perfect

That don't mean you gotta cast me out like I was worthless

I said I had to put you to the side cause I was hurtin'

I'm the one that's looking on my burner cause I earned it

I put you on a pedestal, these days I wish I burned it

I'm sorry for the pain I caused, can't take it back, I'm learnin'

I call her back, I tell her everything that's on my mind

I had to block you out my world cause you infested mine

I knew you for some years, I loved you more than half the time

She told me she can't get attached, not loyal to the bind

You ruined my perspective now I find love hard to find

If we were at the beach I'd go ahead and draw the line

And it's so far away that you can't even see I'm fine

She fed up with all of my talk she text me one last time

Long paragraph, you demeaning me lately

I told her sorry I'm not sorry, you can go ahead and hate me

I don't respond well to anyone who's flaky

I told 'em you can talk for hours but you just can't debate me

You can't save me I'm long gone and I'm crazy

I don't care if you love me or hate me

I talk to god everyday he's the one who forgave me

Thank god you don't talk to me lately cause

I swear, we live the craziest life

One day you want me, next day you swipe left

I'm just tryna make peace with the feelings I kept

Long ride I can't hold on for the rest cause I'm

Moving forward, I can't go back to the past

Gotta learn from my mistakes cause I can never take 'em back

From my perspective, no, you didn't feel bad

From my perspective you would throw me in the trash

I'm tired of lying and sinning

I'm tired of screwing over women for my personal game or my personal gain

I take personal blame for all the shit that I did

Maybe one day I'll forgive but I can never forget

I got some things that you told me that I still can't accept

I'm moving forward everyday I just be trying my best

But it feels like you don't realize you turn my heart to shreds

I'm in need of vengeance, can't help something I'll never get

If you know me you should notice that I killed the old me

Put me in a casket, celebrate my life like matrimony

I don't wanna talk to you again, your fake and phony

You could study me for years but you could never ever clone me

I put you in a list of women I want nothing to do with

Martin Luther King back shots, I give her a movement

I nominate myself the best to ever ever do it

They say "you gotta do something first Cole Myer, you gotta prove it"

I swear I live the craziest life

She wanna fuck, next day she wanna fight

Not my fault that you call me out, you know I'm in the right

It's not my fault you can't handle this life

I'm just being me, I'm just being honest

I'm 12% Indian, I'm Pocahontas

You said you give it up to me, do you promise?

I gotta know if you really really want it

Damn

I guess it's time for me to go put in some work

I put pink all on my body, got me feeling like Lil Uzi Vert

Remember times when I would put you first, well there's no more

I'm doing pushups when I push myself up off the floor

I try my best to be authentic, how am I supposed to be authentic

When your feelings something that you never meant

and I'm just waiting for a cure, you injected me with venom

I'm just telling people that I wish I never met 'em

I took some time to live my life hear my experience

Take me out that box of people you don't wanna hear again

I lost my chance, it hurt more to lose a friend

I don't care about your body, mad bout time I used and spent

I see you up inside my head, my lyrics make you pay the rent

At this point inside my life I don't think I should be content

Everything I do is with intent, I'm Mr. Made It Happen

Fire coming from my breath like I just went and slayed a dragon

My mouth keeps telling me yes

When MyFitnessPal keeps telling me no

I got bout 8 left, 10 sets, 5 pounds to go

I got some things inside my head I think that you'd love to know

And I got things inside my head that I think you'd really hate

But I'ma keep it to myself I hate a pointless debate

While she gon' keep on playing men I'm shocked that she don't feel shame

I'm tired of talking bout the past I'm tired of playing these games because

I never ever not once ever claimed to own ya

I put you in a box of women I don't wanna know of

I heard you claimed to change your stance, you just bent it over

They put me on this winter arc like I'm a super solider

They put me on this winter arc like my name is Noah

Maybe one day we can reconnect when I'm a little older

But for now I think I'm in need of some time to grow up

I'm lost in paradise, I got some shit you'll never know bruh

I don't have an ED, when I starve it's my choice

She said she don't wanna hear me, hate the sound of my voice

They done womanized a weaponizer, I sing with joyce

I put headphones on around with you to drown out the noise

You don't need to make amends, it'll work itself out

That's the saddest truth I've heard, need confirmation right now

I'm tired of talking about some nonsense I'ma make it somehow

I'm tired of lying and tired of sinning, I do what god allow