LOOK MAMA I'M A MAN Lyrics

First time I felt like a man

Sipping out of a Heineken that my grand daddy handed me as a minor

Fake intoxicated the world bigger my eyes wider

Subtle introduction to keeping secrets and real vices

First sip kinda repulsive but I enjoyed it

Nana calling out I ignore it because I'm noided

Going through the motions he laughing I feel it coursing

Through my body swallow a shot of liquor he loaded

Put his palm on side of my face to get me to focus

Moisture in his hand from the bottle that he was holding

Looking back he spoke and said it's disgusting I know it

So I ain't gotta worry about you wanting some more then

Nervous chuckle kept my rebuttal and said okay

Smart enough to notice that's what he want me to say

Way too young to notice that it was a cry for help

The road that he was on he ain't want me on it myself

Honestly it just made my curiosity grow

And think he wasn't viewing me as a kid anymore

Too excited to grow

And step inside of a world of sophisticated adults

With issues I've never known

His way of alerting me to the other side of the coin

The dark side of the moon

I'm stepping inside the void

Keep it rolling

Second time I felt like a man

Confiscating a pistol outta my nana nightstand

I gave a fuck about repercussions or where they a land

I was In love with the feeling I get when it's in my hand

Stupid ass decision be the first one to admit

In my room power tripping tired of feeling powerless

Gained a ounce of confidence for every bullet in the clip

Handkerchief from mini mart to expunge the finger prints

Wasn't thinking bout survival

Honestly Was more attracted to the power

Anger misguided

Never again will they mistake me for a coward

Never again will a nigga sleep where I live and put his hands on my mama

And I don't do nothing bout it

Convincing myself I got what it take

To manipulate the path of a life or even take

Ignoring the repercussions of any action I take

Like them shits don't exist

Childish ignorance

That I use to my benefit

Even my knowledge of using it pretty limited

Outside of music I listened to and some movie clips

25 with a couple nicks on the wooden grip

Anticipating the day that I plan on using it

Same day that I truly bury my innocence

But I'm okay with never being a kid again

Third time I felt like a man

In the living room touching

Got my adrenaline pumping

Hands clammy

I'm nervous tryna unfasten her buttons

Kinda rushing

To get it before her mama come strutting

Through the threshold

Got my Face nestled in her neck

Am I ready for what's next

Shaky breath

I mean I seen this shit in videos

But never in the flesh

Some shit I ain't confess

Heart beating out my chest

But fuck it if she with it then I'm with it

Couple condoms in my pocket that I picked up from the clinic

Put it on, hands shaking cause I'm timid

A feeling that I mentally envisioned for a minute

And we in the same boat she never had nobody in it

Sweat dripping room heavy from the weight of the decision

That we making in a moment graduate from being children

Couple minutes I was in it till I finished

Fingers locked now we staring at the ceiling

Room silent processing what we feeling

In my head like damn boy you did it

You a man now

Just got rid of any doubt I ever had now

Looking at the whole world with a new sight

The moment I been waiting for my whole life