What You Want? Lyrics

Staring at my life it's a dark maze

It be peering back but it's a sharp gaze

I could speak on what it was, tell the reasons

We fell apart and had those dark days

Like when we used to follow at my old place

You'd always end up leaving, said you need space

We'd end up in this cycle where we fight and make up

And fight cause nobody knew how to part ways

But did you even really want me for real

Wanted my love and only stayed for the thrill

Did you

Did you even really want me for real?

Toxic love be fueled by uncontrolled pain

The kind you tell yourself you won't go through again

But the memories they grip you like a chain

And the train of your thoughts leads you closer to insane

Like, you expecting different but they never changed

I know you think it's love but it's just a flame

It's just a game where nobody plays for fame

Maybe riches or a name or a body or just shame

So you get burnt

Thought we learned to love yourself first

Thought we learned that trying to find love from a dom

Who don't know no better gonna leave you hurt and feeling worse

Talking to myself with this verse

Wanted real love, was it my turn

Wanted real love but I got burned

I just took another L, I had to learn

I had to learn

If I choose violence, it's controlled rage

I'ma choose the weapons but you made the stage

And I just find it strange

How you destroyed all the pillars and the building crashed

But I took the blame

But did you even really want me for real

Wanted my love or only stayed for the thrill

Did you

Did you

Did you even really want me for real

When you need me, swing through with that rosé

Pretend like you single, I like that roleplay

Toxic love be fueled by uncontrolled pain

Might just hit the streets but that's my always

Sometimes I think of you when it's a cold day

Like how you loved but did it in your own way

Like how you treated things we had to throw away

The vivid memories, some things don't fade away

And lately I've been feeling resistance

It's not the fact of something but maybe something's missing

And I would confide but I know you probably wouldn't listen

Or you would but your perception leads you somewhere different

Ay, but that's cool, I know you just being you

You cant see through my eyes, you cant walk in my shoes

And I gotta thank your mama because she made a jewel

Bad days left me amazed but I was still loving you

Even when your sharp edges hurt me

Even when we were losing hope and feelings moved inertly

Even after arguments your entire being cursed me

Even when my brain asked if you did deserve me

Even when my heart said be patient you would learn me

Even after trust and trust again after you burned me

Even when you left but somehow ended up returning

It's a Long journey